JustShowUp

It’s been a while folks…

Still at it — a little on the frustrated side…trying to be patient.  School has been out for more than a month now and despite working out pretty darn regularly and watching what I eat more than I had in the previous months I have not lost any weight…inches yes - but not like I think I should.

 So here I sit at 225 — STILL.  Did P90X for almost two months but found I resented being told what work out to do everyday - my life is so dictated by schedules that I like to fly by the seat of my pants sometimes - plus it left me too tired to really work on my running…

Yes, I am still having a love affair with running…LOL  Pretty darn sure it is a part of who I am at this point.  I have decided to run a 1/2 marathon in September and am following a training schedule to get me there.  Currently my longest run has been 7 miles…not a very pretty 7 miles - but 7 miles nonetheless - pretty will come later.

Pretty would come faster if I could just drop some of this FLIPPIN weight!  What is holding me back??  Seriously - the hard part is accepting you have to do it and getting started - I am so far past that it is not even funny and yet here I stay. 

So back to the beginning.  Buddyslim got me started on this road nearly 3 years ago - wow has it been that long?  I have met some really great ladies through BS and I am in desperate need of some kick ass inspiration.  I know that this is the place that I will be able to find it….

So come on BS peeps - send some of that inspiration my way!!!  I would greatly appreciate it!!

If you know me then you know my ultimate goal is to be a runner…I love running…I am training for a 10k as we speak.  But my friend Nicole asked me if I would like to join her on a 3 mile walk today - race walking.  She is also a runner and is training for a marathon - in addition to training for a walk race this summer.  So I said sure!  Why not - race walking…pishaw!  I RUN!  LOL

 Ummm….yeah - kicked my ass!  LOL  the muscles used in race walking are definitly different than running muscles…LOL  But it was GREAT!  I wanted to die the first mile and  half - my whole entire lower half was on fire…burning like a son of a gun!  But then it went numb like it does after I have been running for about 10 minutes.  Afterwards I felt AWESOME!!!

I had the same high I get when I run - only my knees didn’t hurt…I can already feel that I am going to be sore in the morning…and I can’t wait to do 4 miles tomorrow!

So amazingly enough I am down a pound - how did that happen?  Not really sure…LOL  I only ran once this week and my eating leaves a lot to be desired…but I have increased my intake of water to what it is supposed to be so maybe that is it…LOL  I did go shopping today so that I can stock my lunches with healthy foods starting Monday when classes start again.  Things are so different these days.  I have earned my own trust back.  I trust myself completely to follow through. I remember very clearly feeling like I couldn’t count on myself to start a weighloss journey and to see it through. 

I guess maybe that is what the change is.  I don’t see it as a weight loss journey anymore.  I see it as just how my life is.  End of story.  That gives me a confidence in myself that I have never had before. 

My husband still hasn’t decided his goal…but you know what - it makes little difference to me.  If he doesn’t decide and I reach my goal by April 30th of 30 lbs. - then I win.  And I get my overnight date with the nun and all…LOL

On another note - my 16 year old daughter got her learners permit today to drive…oh Lord!  It is a tough thing to let her drive and pretend like I am scared out of my wits…LOL  Seriously though - she does really well driving.  I am very impressed with her.  Just hard to swallow that my baby girl just took a HUGE step towards independance.

While I was at the Washington DMV getting her her permit, I decided I would get my WA DL.  I have one from North Carolina where we were stationed last.  I have maintained my California DL all along - until 4 days before we left North Carolina and then I only got a NC license because mine expired.   But I LOVE Washington and I have every intention of making this my home.  So as a symbolic gesture I wanted to get my drivers license.  While I was there I decided to get an enhanced license which gives me the freedom to cross the boarder into Canada and Mexico and then come back into the US.  I have a VERY close friend in  Canada that I want to visit soon so I figured why not?  You have to go through a little application process and short interview.  They send your app to Homeland Security and they approve you or deny you.  Well I was denied!  Apparently the Birth Certificate that I have been using going on 39 years is not a birth certificate at all but a notice that my birth was registered in the state of Connecticut where I was born and that the official certificate was filed in the State archives…WHAT THE HELL?

So now apparently Homeland Security viewed me as a security threat and I have to contact Connecticut to get a certified copy before I can get an enhanced DL…unbelievable!

My husband thought this was incredibly funny…he thinks I must really be Mexican afterall…LOL 

So I woke up this morning totally fired up!  I promised to get back on plan on the 5th of January - which I did - but it wasnt until this morning that I woke up with the EXCITEMENT of the process. 

 When I am working out regularly and eating right I feel invinceable.  I feel like I can take over the world.  Which always makes me wonder why I stop doing it sometimes…but that thought is like comprehending that the sky never ends or understanding how the internet works - just makes my head hurt so I try not to think about it…LOLOL

Yesterday I ordered a new workout video - Flirty Girl Fitness - learning to dance like a Rap Video girl in an aerobic exercise format…hahaha  I LOVE LOVE the idea - I mean really - totally MULTIFUNCTIONAL - get it shape and learn something new for hubby….LOL  Am excited for that to get here…LOL  Pathetic - I know…LOL

Proposed a little competition (friendly of course) to my hubby last night.  I am a competitive person but I have learned to control that side of me - except when it comes to my husband.   The idea of him beating me at something drives me NUTS…so what better motivation to reach my goal then to mix it with some little bet with my hubby…LOL

So our little wager consists of reaching a set goal by April 30.  My goal is 30 lbs.  Not sure what his goal is yet - since he has not much weight to lose but is more interested in the the pumping iron part of fitness I have a feeling that it will be something related to that…but it has to be of an equal effort level.  When I win - LOL  - I get an overnight date with my hubby and a hot little Nun’s outfit I have waiting in the wings…LOL (yes, I am like a man - most of my thoughts revolve

around sex…LOL)

Anyway - so I am back to tracking my food on Sparkpeople - and of course I started my new 10k training program - and I am going to combine that with yoga and whatever other workout videos I have (and I have an EXTENSIVE library).  Plus school starts again on Monday and this is going to be a super busy semester so that will help…

I hope all of you woke up this morning with motivation and determination on your mind…

LET DO THIS!

So yesterday was day one back on track - I promised myself that I would start on the 4th and I did.  I ran run #1 in my 10k training program and boy oh boy was it ugly!!  Holy crap!  Before finals I had worked my way up to a 6 mile run - yesterday I struggled with half that distance!  Man I suck!  I could FEEL the fat bouncing up and down on my ass - words cannot express how much I HATE that!  More than that - I felt out of control.  For me running is successful when I am in control of my breathing, my movements, my stride, etc.  And I was WAY WAY WAY out of control.

Bright side?  (Cause with me you know there is ALWAYS a bright side…LOL)  The first run is OVER!  And it can only get better and easier here on out…besides - it’s not as though I have taken YEARS off from running - just a month or so…won’t take me but a week or two to get back in the groove…

My eating still leaves a lot to be desired - but come Monday when school starts that will be in line as well - since I only pack healthy foods…so I am not too stressed on that…all in good time…LOL

Hope everyone else is having a wonderful day…

Remember - SELF DISCIPLINE IS THE ABILITY TO TAKE ACTION REGARDLESS OF YOUR MENTAL STATE!!

 Peace out!

It has been a long while since I have been on here.  But I am back now - and I am happy to see some of my old Buddyslim buddies are still here! 

When I left I had just started the BSN program at Washington State and now I am half way through.  I start my 3rd semester on Monday.  The first semester was a tough one and I put about 30 lbs on…I took that weight off over the summer and then last semester I was able to keep that weight off all the way until finals.  Then between then and now I have put some of that weight back on - not sure how much - will check tomorrow.

This semester I plan on making it the whole semester without screwing up the fitness factor.  I am still running - and am more in love with it then ever.  My hubby and I will be running our first 10k in March - so I am training for that starting today. 

While in Iraq my hubby found a rock hard body under all his fluffiness but has since covered it with fluff again…LOL  He is determined to dig out the hard body and so am I…so for once we are on the same page…that is a nice feeling.

For those of you that don’t know me - I have struggled with my weight my whole life - I had a huge battle with emotional eating (I think I have that under control these days).  I am in a different place then I have ever been before - while I did put some weight on I have never really fallen off the wagon.  That is new for me - either I am really focused and totally “on it” or I am completely off it…LOL  But I have finally figured out how to just be…how to have healthy eating and exercise just be a part of who I am.  What a relief not to have to work through the mental aspect of weight loss….

“Self Discipline is the ability to take action regardless of your mental state” - that is my motto these days and it is what keeps me going.  Saying that out loud is what causes me to take a mental inventory of my reasoning for eating something I shouldn’t, skipping a workout or not giving it my all.  If I can’t come up with some reason why it HAS to be a certain way - then I know it is my mental state - and that cannot play a factor in what I have to do.  Just do it or don’t.  there is no try.

So I am back and I will support and love you all through your weight loss journey just as I have in the past and I am looking forward to the love and support that the people on this site so freely give.

 Let’s do this thing!

Hi everyone!  Just wanted to say hello!  Nursing school started and I am swamped…the baby has been sick and he generously shared with is momma (thank you very much - I really needed that!)  I am so excited about school that I can hardly stand myself!  I can’t believe that I am finally here!

So there is much to learn and they just throw it at you - but that is ok - I am up for the challenge!

My eating hasn’t been great this week - but I did get in a couple of good workouts!  Things will be good once I settle into a routine.  It is nice because there are several of us that are diet/exercise concious so that makes it easier.

I got a new video - The Biggest Loser Weight Loss Yoga with BOB!!!

It is a GREAT video!  I only did the Week 1-2 section which lasts 35 minutes but I was sweating like a stuck pig!  I LOVED IT!!  And you know - that Bob - OH MY - he is so HOT I would do just about anything that he told me too…downward dog anyone?  LOL  (That’s bad…I know…LOL)

Ok - the word YUMMM-O comes to mind!!

LOLOL!!  Anyway - I miss everyone and hope that everyone is hanging in there!  We can do this people!

(((HUGS)))

Oh my goodness!! I LOVE this thing!  My mom bought it for me for Christmas and it took a week before I could steal it back from my kids because they love it too…LOL  But I have really gotten in to it!  It is a great addition to the things that I already do in my workouts!

The greatest thing about it is that it is FUN!  And when it is so much fun you really look forward to working out.  I find myself wanting to do it several times a day!  LOL!  The boxing really works your upper body and after the first day of trying it my biceps, triceps and back were all sore!  It was great!

The hula hoop game is so much fun and is really silly but if you get into it your thighs will be screaming….LOL  And of course I love the running games…those are just plain fun.  The great thing is the more you do it the better you get and then you can unlock games that are a little more difficult.

I love the Yoga section too…ah heck - I just love yoga…LOL

Do I think that it is enough to accomplish all that I need in every workout? No.  But is it a great addition?  Absolutely!  My 15 year old daughter has even fallen in love with it and I have had to bribe her before to exercise by threatening to take her phone…LOL  So that says it all!

Yes, I fell off the weight loss, exercise wagon for the last week.  I couldn’t even FIND that stupid wagon.  But last night as I was laying around being lazy after eating whatever I wanted for the 7th day in a row I realized that that wagon had GPS and the beeping was loud in my head.

*SIGH*

I had to wonder why I fell of the wagon…I think it was a combination of things.   I am a feeling stuffer - I deal with difficult emotions by ignoring them…and then I work my way into a funk and a bad mood.  This is the first holiday that my daughter was with her dad and we had a quiet holiday with just us.  I didn’t think I was bothered by that but I guess I was.  I have a HUGE emotional hurdle to get over on Monday - my youngest son (he’s 3) is starting preschool/daycare full time and although I KNOW this is a great place for him and it is something that will be good for him, it makes my heart ache…I don’t deal well with that so I ignore it and that helps my funky mood.  Then on Thursday I start nursing school at WSU - I am soooo excited - this is what I have wanted to do since I was 5 and it has taken a long time to get here…but I think I am scared…LOL  As silly as that sounds - I have been a stay at home mom for the last 6 years while going to school at night…now it will be like having a full time job.  I have thoroughly enjoyed staying home with my kids…

Believe me I know that once I get started I will be the happiest and most full-filled person on the planet.  I loved working and being independant.  I love having a busy life.  I loved doing something I was good at and I know that nursing is my calling.

I worry about juggling everything - my husband is not here to help- and he will be in Iraq for most of my first year anyway - I was a single mom for years…but what if I forgot how to juggle it all - LOL  I know I will slip right into the juggling routine right away like nothing…but these are the things that are in the back of my mind that I try to ignore…and that also aids in my funky mood.

But like I said, the GPS was beeping last night and this morning I feel the NEED, yes it is a NEED as real as my need to breath to get back on track.  If I am going to be at the top of my game then I need to be on plan.  I feel so much better and able to handle life when my diet and my exercise plans are working.  So last night I warned my family that today I would be back on my usual routine and that their presence at home was not going to hinder that.  I got up this morning had my egg white breakfast and I am heading upstairs for my first REAL workout since Christmas Day.  I know once I get this workout started I will be back on plan completely.  I know how working out makes me feel and that changes everything.  My funky mood will be history…makes me wonder why I just didn’t force myself to workout days ago…except that I think I needed to be in a funky mood.  It is the only time I think that I really deal with things like missing my daughter or worrying about the new chapter of my life that starts next week…

So my buddies…PERSEVERANCE is the word of the day…

Perseverance is the key for me…keep at it and all will be good.

Happy New Year buddies…and thanks for reading my rant…LOL

(((HUGS)))

Stacey

No lie, and it has nothing to do with alcohol!  I seriously think  it is a food, carb, fat hangover!  NO JOKE!  I woke up this morning around 4 am with a hangover headache from hell and it is still hanging around the fringes of my brain.

We had a nice, quiet Christmas - just Rico and I and the kids.  We had traditional tamales (yummy…=)) for Christmas Eve and  I cooked a turkey with the usual trimmings for Christmas Day and I only had one helping of each - would be quite successful in the food department if that were one of my food demons…

But for me, it is cheese and crackers, chocolate candy and cake.  (at least this year).  My hubby’s sister sent us a box full of See’s Candies for Christmas - not too tempting until I got to these Almond Rocca thingys….

And then taking a page from Catrina’s book I decided to bake a cake to celebrate the birth of Jesus.  I made an old family recipe - A Googlhoopf cake - basically a really most yellow cake with chocolate chips - yummmmmooooo.

I ate too much Christmas day and slightly more than usual yesterday.  I did continue to get a good workout in - even shoveled snow for an hour anda half on Christmas day - just so I could burn extra calories.  I don’t feel like I did any serious damage - and I got up this morning ready to get back to business…

Made my usual egg white, coffee breakfast.  My mom bought me the Wii Fit for Christmas so I am gonna try that out today in addition to walking a few miles..

Just wish this hangover headache would go away - maybe that I will remember it the next time I want to grossly overindulge in bad foods…LOL

Hope everyone had a peaceful, joyous holiday!

Love to my buddies!!1!