JustShowUp

I can’t believe how much I miss getting on here and reading about everyone and their daily victories and struggles!  We made it to Washington and if driving 3000 miles wasn’t enough we made a 16 hour trip down to Southern California to visit family.  We are currently making our way back up north - slowly but surely - and should be back to WA next week.

As you all know I survived the trip cross country and felt really good about my food choices along the way.  I can honestly say, however, that I have failed miserably since being home and somehow that has managed to make me really motivated and really excited to get back north to make my own home and focus on my weight loss plan.  My husband is Mexican and I am Italian - so pasta and tortillas- not really weight loss food…LOL

I feel really okay though.  I am not sure why that is - maybe because I have been allowing myself the little indulgences but I have not been going overboard and I am still making good choices along the way (even if I did let myself have big bowl of pasta alfredo with rock shrimp and some of my mother-in-laws homemade tortillas - yummmo).

I think the key is that I don’t feel like I have lost control.  I think that even the not-so-good choices I have made have been deliberate indulgences and not a total loss of control like in the past.   In the past, that pasta would have sent me on a downward spiral for a couple of weeks.  What with the woe is me attitude that has always accompanied my overeating and the guilt that I used as an excuse to continue over eating.  Thats It!!!  It didn’t occur to me until right now that the reason those things didn’t send me over the edge is because I don’t feel guilty.  My LIFE has changed…so the commitment is still there…even when I momentarily fall of the wagon…LOL

You know what?  That feels really good!  I feel like God has released me from the bondage of food.   WOW what an epiphany!

As usual I get HUGE insight from posting on here….thanks for being there buddies!!